Four Months Later

Today before I went on my walk/run (aka 5k Training) I decided to sneak some pictures of myself in the bathroom at the Y. I say "sneak" because it's against policy to take pictures in the first place and secondly, it's embarrassing to get caught (which I did but I quickly ran into a stall). When I got home I decided to see if I could find pictures of myself from a few months back. Success! Although the picture of me in the pink shirt isn't the greatest angle it gives me a good idea of where I was. I should note that the reason I have my hip jutting out is because I was trying to appear more "curvy." As you notice in the second picture, the "curviness" of my body didn't matter because I liked what I saw head-on. 

It's only been four months and I swear, I don't know where time went. When I started this blog I thought it would be a great motivational tool. I also wanted to document my journey (are you getting tired of that word yet?) Last Sunday marked my 12th week blogging and it feels empowering to know that I've made it this far. I've committed myself to something bigger than myself. Every step of the way I make mistakes, I trip and I fall, but I've decided that I'm not going to be the victim anymore. I'm not going to beat myself up over a cookie or a pasta dish. I'm going to say, "Well, that sucked" and then move on and do better the next day. I'm tired of scolding myself. I am human and as a human, I make mistakes. Four months ago I was positioning myself to make myself look different - I wasn't happy with my body and I was very insecure. Now, I'm facing myself head-on and I'm not ashamed. I am proud of myself. 

April 2012

August 2012

Until next time, keep smiling!

Sunday Weigh-in 010

Week ten people! I am on week ten. This week's weigh in isn't the best since it's a gain but I decided that I can't be upset if the scale goes up. It's going to happen from time to time so I can't make myself upset over it. It's not fair to my mind or body.

THIS IS OKAY, KRISTEN!

This week was especially difficult for me. I was disheartened on Friday when I realized how sad I've felt all week. I felt heavy and unmotivated which is weird because the scale was slightly lower and I found myself exercising every day this week. Training for my 5k is becoming more difficult by the day and I don't know if it has anything to do with how fatigued my body felt this week. However, what I did learn this week is that I need to give my body a rest. Last Sunday, I ran/walked around my neighborhood even though I wasn't suppose to train that day.

This Sunday I decided to take a break. I went to brunch with my family and then headed out to Balboa Park with my friend, Victoria. It was a great way for me to clear my head and refocus for the week. August is going to be really busy at work and I'm not looking forward to the tiredness I am going to feel this month.

Victoria enjoying the sun (or lack of underneath the trees).

Me staring into the sun. The sun is a great way to instantly make yourself feel better. It seems to refresh me and help me refocus myself. There's nothing better than enjoying what nature has to offer. 

Listening to planes overhead. Never forgetting that we're in the middle of a city. 

Rex watching us paint. 

The relaxation I enjoyed today put a lot of things into perspective. My friend Victoria has such an amazing way with words and I am so happy to have someone like her in my life. Sometimes when you're feeling down about life, or your goals, it's great to be able to openly talk about it with someone who can help give insight. Victoria understands my lack of motivation and the fact that I'm upset because I'm not noticing changes right now. However, she helped me realize that I am changing in ways that aren't obvious right now. We discussed my eating habits and the fact that I track calories. She also reminded me that I'm working out everyday. These are things I know and sometimes deny but they're true! I am working hard, harder than I ever have before. 

Until next time, keep smiling!